Free Entry 1, Week 5

This is my go with the litany with the anaphora of "thanks".

Thanks

To the hoops that have been robbed of their swooshing glory, I thank you.
Thank you to that one kid in the back of the classroom spreading the smell of nacho cheese Doritos.
My professors, who I would like to thank for the never ending cycle  of Calculus, Homer, and Arrhenius' Law.
Thanks Publix, for making shopping a pleasure.
Elementary Schools, gracias for teaching lefties to write in an oh so awkward curved position.
Thank you so much gala apples and Walmart 35 oz bags of frozen fruit.
Thanks to public speaking classes were I can beat the all time "Saying the most ummm's in one presentation" record.
To you all, I thank.